My Failure As A Wife

When food gets burned, or too salty or bland, or sometimes we just can't explain why we still call it food I'm glad I can still make some "decent" meals and have control of other things.I have to admit, I often try to justify to my husband these unfortunate events and I try to convince him and myself that the things that go wrong aren't all my fault. But this time there is no way out, I have damage nearly everything, from his socks to his favorite shirts even his bath towel 90% of his clothes are faded looking like I tie-dyed them. Last week he bought another shirt, so he could have something that doesn't look tie-dyed. I washed it on Thursday and as usual it looks tie-dyed again. This time this is not an excuse, but honestly I didn't put bleach on it nor on the past laundry, I changed my detergent powder for the third time because some friends here said it also happens when they wash their clothes and the powdered detergent has lots of bleach on it. Still I'm getting the same faded-tie-dyed results. I still don't know what the culprit is, but I'm starting to blame the water now.  It smells like there's too much chlorine or bleach on it. 

Five months ago I noticed  my baby had dry and rough skin and she smells more like bleach after bathing. So, I started using the drinking water to bathe her... (if ever you are reading this, yes that explains why our consumption of commercialized drinking water is like that, but you have to thank me, she doesn't smell like bleach and her skin never gets dry like before). Maybe I have to test my theory about the tap water and try to wash our clothes with the drinking water now, but that will be too expensive I guess... yeah I know its not a "guess", its a fact. 

Yesterday he looks mad, just half (50%) mad because he's afraid it will make him look old if he ever gets mad(100%). But I completely understand how it feels when you bought something and not being able to wear it decently, I also ruined one of my favorite pink dress after the third time I wash it, it just happened that he wasn't able to wear it decent not even for the first time. He still has one favorite shirt that's not damaged and I'm looking forward to not damaging it when I wash it today. And if ever it will end up looking tie-dyed again, I think I'll be doomed.

Maybe I have to try to hand wash it? Or maybe I can start selling tie-dyed shirts now. 

At least with my failures in laundrying, I get the assurance that I'm still human and not a Stafford wife. I wonder if Stafford wives wash with their hands or they use washing machine? 

One way or another I promise I'll take control of the laundry too, if I have I'll use the commercial drinking water and find other ways of doing the laundry. And maybe try to invent some type of clothing that doesn't get faded even if I wash it with bleach instead of water and detergent. Oh if I can clone clothes then he doesn't have to know what happened, and I don't have to worry what will happen the next time I do the laundry.

What Is The Little Lady Thinking?

Last week while a nurse was getting blood sample for my CBC test, we had this cute experience with our little lady who is turning 7 months few days from then. She has this amusing stare at me and the nurse, her eyebrows raised as usual. As soon as the nurse pricked my arms with needles she screamed cheering happily. When the nurse was done, she clapped her hands. The nurse herself can't help laughing. We don't know what to think, does she have a clue what's going on?

She's now seven months, able to sit without support. She still enjoys sleeping with us and trying to call papa once she knows he has fallen to sleep, while her little hands clung to his arms and sometimes tapping him on his back. That's her way of telling him wake up we're not done playing papa.

Above is her 7 month birthday picture taken after we arrived home from our whole day visit at Ate Cris' house. 

A Thought About My Family

Three days ago while we were walking along the many stores in Al Khobar and dh is pushing the  stroller,  Hevyn  reached my abaya(black muslim gown worn by women), later she was holding my finger and we were holding hands while walking. I told dh to take a look at us, the people on the streets are also looking at me and my 6 month old daughter on how sweet she holds my hand while she is being pushed on her stroller and I walk beside. Of course dh was jealous of me because Hevyn doesn't want him to touch her hand what more to hold hands with him.

Yesterday, Friday, wasn't as good as three days ago. I'm trying to nurse Hevyn to get her to sleep, but because she ate a lot of soup  she refused to be nursed. There are times like that, and no matter what I do, there is no place like papapa's arms. Dh took her, and in no less than five minutes she's not moving but her pulse are good, she's sleeping I can't believe it. I must admit, I can't get her to sleep without nursing her and dh can do it without difficulty. Well, I think Hevyn is not treating me unfairly with it, because once she wakes up and I'm not around no matter what papapa does she wouldn't stop crying but once she sees me, crying is over mama is here.

There is a big difference between a mother and a father, they do have different roles to fill inside the home particularly in rearing children. Both have unique yet equally imporytant roles. For Hevyn, mama is the great friend and food, and papapa is the great playmate and sleeping bed. 

I must admit, there are times that she just wants her father, and there are times that its me and not her father.  

The Family A Proclamation To The World states :

 "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners."

By divine design man and woman have different responsibilities inside the home, we cannot change nor justify it with same-sex marriage. 

This is not a battle on equality, this is about morality. Equality and balance comes as husband and wife fills their unique roles and responsibilities in the home.

To those who say that traditional marriage cannot and will not be affected by same-sex-marriage. I can't imagine raising my child in a society where same-sex marriage is legally accepted, and yet teach my child about morality, chastity, and the importance of family in the divine plan of happiness. How do we sustain a law that we believe is not teaching the  moral principles of marriage and directly contradicts the teachings of Jesus Christ?

Proposition 8 is not a discrimination to homosexuals. But same sex marriage is immoral conduct, and this is not what we wanted to teach our children. We wanted to teach our children to abhor sin, and to learn to love everyone as a child of God. And loving means teaching the right ways, and guiding if necessary toward what is right.

Same Sex Marriage, A Civil Right?

Today I felt compelled to say something about my stand, about what I believe regarding the issue of same sex marriage.

For the past couple of weeks, I've read blog posts regarding Proposition 8, and the legalization of same sex marriage. There are those who view it at as a civil right, some said its a matter of freedom to choose who you want to marry- and everyone both the religious and civil group should have that freedom to exercise marriage in their own way. 


Is same-sex marriage a matter of civil right?

Way back in 1999, Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley has addressed this issue and this is what he has said:

"Some portray legalization of so-called same-sex marriage as a civil right. This is not a matter of civil rights; it is a matter of morality. Others question our constitutional right as a church to raise our voice on an issue that is of critical importance to the future of the family. We believe that defending this sacred institution by working to preserve traditional marriage lies clearly within our religious and constitutional prerogatives. Indeed, we are compelled by our doctrine to speak out.
Nevertheless, and I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married.

I commend those of our membership who have voluntarily joined with other like-minded people to defend the sanctity of traditional marriage. As part of a coalition that embraces those of other faiths, you are giving substantially of your means. The money being raised in California has been donated to the coalition by individual members of the Church. You are contributing your time and talents in a cause that in some quarters may not be politically correct but which nevertheless lies at the heart of the Lord’s eternal plan for His children, just as those of many other churches are doing. This is a united effort.

...We regard it as not only our right but our duty to oppose those forces which we feel undermine the moral fiber of society. Much of our effort, a very great deal of it, is in association with others whose interests are similar. We have worked with Jewish groups, Catholics, Muslims, Protestants, and those of no particular religious affiliation, in coalitions formed to advocate positions on vital moral issues. Such is currently the case in California, where Latter-day Saints are working as part of a coalition to safeguard traditional marriage from forces in our society which are attempting to redefine that sacred institution. God-sanctioned marriage between a man and a woman has been the basis of civilization for thousands of years. There is no justification to redefine what marriage is. Such is not our right, and those who try will find themselves answerable to God...

...We shall go on pursuing the path which the Lord has marked out before us. We shall try to be strong and faint not as we pursue those programs and practices which have been established and maintained through generations of time."

The world is constantly changing, at least let our voices be heard. That is our right. And we have to do something, because somehow what's going to happen will have a great impact on the kind of world where our posterity is going to live. Could we afford to let it just happen when we can do something now? If we want to make the world a better place, specially for the future generation we have to uphold the moral values of our society.

Together with Paula of A-Large Room I say this to you:

" In our society, it is our children, born and unborn, who bear those consequences. Our nation was founded on principles of freedom, virtue and self-sacrifice. We who hold its destiny in our hands today. We, who will determine the world our children will grow up in and inherit, need to embrace all three of those values. Sometimes what I want must be set aside in favor of what my society needs. And right now our society does not need for the meaning of marriage to be further diluted. Marriage, as the life-long union of a man and a woman who will bear and raise the next generation of children, must be preserved. We cannot afford the loss of meaning that will occur if we re-define marriage to include same-sex (and inherently infertile) relationships. We as individuals make choices. We as a society also have a choice to make. We must choose the future. Support America's families. Support America's future. Please vote yes to protect traditional marriage in California, Florida and Arizona."

YES on California Proposition 8 http://protectmarriage.com/
YES on Arizona Proposition 102 http://yesformarriage.com/
YES on Florida Proposition 2 http://www.yes2marriage.org/

She Call's Him Papapa

Hevyn turned 6 months last Oct. 15. She's now a talkative darling. I don't know how she learned it, on her fourth month she first said "mama" while we we're staring at the closet mirror with Winnie the Pooh sticker. She touched the sticker and said "mama"- obviously that's not "mama", but at least she learned now that I am "mama". When she turned 5 months, she became more talkative and seemed to immitate a conversation with us by mumbling (really sounds like she's conversing with us). That's when she learned how to call her father "papapa" in a very sweet darling tone as if saying "helo". Since she's a baby, we're trying to teach her to call him "dada", but this is how she wanted to call him "papapa"....

We co-sleep by the way, and every morning she wakes up she would touch my face and hold my messy hair and say "mama, mama". How sweet, it just feels like heaven to wake up this way. In the afternoon, my dh also takes a nap once he gets home and Hevyn does the same to him, of course he wouldn't be able to sleep. Her sweetness just makes us want to play with her more.

Home is truly a heaven on earth. I couldn't ask for more. I'm grateful for my dear husband who's working really hard to sustain us with our needs. Of course I could choose to work prestigiously as an accountant here. But its truly a blessing to be a stay at home wife and be able to take care of my families needs personally,  see my daughter grow each day and be there for her anytime she needs me.